My calf muscle is sometimes stretched so tight that I worry it might snap, and so it isn’t entirely unfamiliar to see me crouched by the edge of the road massaging to tension out so that if I do fall over, it wont result in an injury that will take a long time to heal. Today the muscle tightness was partnered with nausea.
Your mind is a pretty powerful thing. It gives in and sends signals to your body that tell you to stop. There’s an oval near my house that I could run around a bunch of times, but instead I choose most of the time to go along the roads, in spite of the hill. About 2km into that run, I end up committed to the 6km loop because turning around would mean going up a hill I hate running up but love running down.
Today that was a good choice. It meant I kept on going, with muscle pain and nausea as my companions. I walked about 70% of the way, because I haven’t run regularly since July, and my mind kept telling me that I couldn’t do it. Depression is louder than determination sometimes. Today I chose to listen to determination. It was a much more encouraging voice.
It was a slow run/walk, but it is done. And God, in all his infinite wisdom, has made our bodies in such a way that exercise means that endorphins have kicked in to fight off the clouds of depression that fog my mind, and in a few hours, I’ll be soundly asleep.
Don’t let depression win. Leave the house. Let the fresh air rejuvenate you. Let the sore muscles and flipping stomach remind you that you should never stop training.
Just, don’t let it win.