“At a family gathering one time, this little boy started to yell “Stars! Stars!” when it began to rain outside. When Rob asked his sister-in-law why her son kept saying “Stars! Stars!”, she replied that for a brief moment, in her son’s understanding of his world, the rain drops would look like stars exploding when they hit the ground.That little boy saw exciting stars when he was surrounded on every side by the giant drops rain.
He saw the stars…not just the drops of rain.
He saw the beauty in the pain.
I want to see the drops like stars. Not just the drops. Because when I run away from the drops, I miss seeing the stars.”
I don’t know a lot about children. I gauge my knowledge off of knowing one particular almost 4 year by the name of Levi. He is adorable, and persistent in his curiousity. “But why?” is his most often asked question. “Because someone made it that way.” will be the response from the adult nearest. “But why?” he will respond, eyes wide and a smile on his face. “They thought that was the best way to do it.” the still entranced adult replies. “But why?” he persists. The now slightly annoyed adult grits their teeth and expands further, and will eventually speak the words Levi now knows to repeat back to questions when he is asked them. “Just is.”
And the conversation ends.
That is how my conversations with God go often. I constantly ask the same question, and he speaks into the situation in his own way. “But why?” I ask, even when he explains… “But why?” I ask as someone tends to my new wound. “But why?” I ask as someone holds my hand through the pain. “BUT WHY?!” I scream as the rain doesn’t stop and I continue trying to find futile cover from the constant drops. It’s an accurate picture of my last year. And oddly, I don’t regret the questions, but I do regret not taking a moment to realise the purprse for the rain. Honestly, I’m still unsure of the purpose… but God doesn’t owe me the answer. He simply says, “just is. Trust me.”
Stop. Stop screaming. Stop crying. Stop speaking. Stop. Look…
Look at the stars…
Sometimes it’s hard to tell when they’re there. Sometimes your eyes are clouded by tears. But in the rain, God is still good. And he has a purpose.
I want to see the drops like stars…
Open my eyes, Lord.